H2-Eau

I don't speak French. Not even close, if you can come close to speaking a language.

One thing I do know is that "water" in French is "eau." While I'm not positive, I believe this is pronounced rather like "oh." I also happen to know that it would be very awkward for me to use this word in casual conversation.

I tried when I went to France. Because I wanted to be cool. This is probably how it happened:

The french waiter with the twirly mustache (no, I don't think he actually had one, but he should have) looked at me expectantly for my drink order and I said, "Oh."

Does no one else find this weird? Seriously, if someone said that to me, I would think they had just remembered something ("Oh!") or had a sudden painful feeling in their stomach ("Oooh"). I would not think, "Ah, this person would like some water." I just wouldn't. So I can't imagine anyone would think that when I said it to them.

Anyway, this post is not about the French language. It's about eau. No, I didn't just remember something. I meant it's about water.

When I went in for my last ultrasound (pics of my innards can be found here), the technician casually mentioned, as I was leaving, that I should be drinking lots of water. I mean, really like thrown in as a side note as I was walking out the door. I don't think she noticed anything weird or anything.

Although, it wouldn't have surprised me if she did. Like, wouldn't have surprised me if she was like, "Hmm...looks like your blood is carbonated," or something like that.

Because here's the thing: I don't drink water.

GASP!

But really, I don't. Water bores me. I need excitement in my life. I love bubbles. Soda is my best friend. We've have sleepovers and paint each others' toenails. Juice is my very good friend. We do lunch and shopping and gossip about the unpopular kids.

Like water.

The most unfortunate part of my attitude towards water is pretty obvious: water is like the freaking best thing you can put in your body. And yes, soda and juice have water in them...but apparently putting sugar and flavors and stuff in water detracts from its amazing nutritional value.

Oh and also...don't tell me that flavored water is a compromise. I would much rather stay on speaking terms with you. That stuff is nashty.

Anyway, the point is, I took ultrasound technician lady's words to heart. She's right - I do need to drink lots of water. My baby needs water. I need water. It's like, a freaking life force. More hydration equals more energy and fewer headaches. I'm all about that.

Although I haven't had a headache in a while anyway...maybe I don't need this after all...

Ok, that was the evil little voice in my head/taste buds. It has been silenced.

So anyway, this has been the story of how a large jug of water became my close friend.

Or at least, one of those fake friends your mom makes you hang out with because no one else will.

And please, don't think you have to tackle me if you see me drinking soda. I didn't say I was giving that up, did I? Who do you think I am, Buddha? No. Just drinking less of the bubbly stuff and more of the pure stuff.

Bets on how long this lasts?